Matthew 4:1-11 (Temptation of Jesus)
“Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.”
After a baptism
that approached apocalypticism,
I saw my chance
to lose His blissfulness
out there in the wilderness.
Twice I started my pitch with the facade
“If you are the Son of God,”
He didn’t fall for any of that bologna
Instead He quoted Deuter-o-nomy.
That caused me to lose my cool,
Because scripture is my best deceiving tool.
I recklessly offered Him the whole plantation
(I even threw in the ocean)
The simple asking price of this temptation
Give me Your total devotion.
He laughed and requested the title deed,
As He viewed my sorry attack as mediocre
Yeah, I know
His daddy is the world’s biggest broker.
He again quoted Scripture
and asked me to depart.
Now I gotta work
on His disciples
if I’m going to break His heart.